viernes, 1 de febrero de 2013

A new error

(I'm obsessed with this movie)

I clutched the cigarette until my fingers were sore. Unzipping my dress, we started talking about the simplicity of what we were going to do. In a flash, I was standing in front of my bed, in front of him ‘au naturel’, defenseless, utterly vulnerable. He looked at me, touched my inner thighs and said that I shouldn’t worry because I’m beautiful. I kept thinking that something’s not right with me; this kind of stuff is not what I usually do. I repeated as he kissed my breasts, “You’re not doing anything wrong”. After a few minutes of arousal I decided to not give a fuck because, what’s the chance of seeing this poor bastard again? He’s gorgeous; has a lovely body, stunning green eyes and wants to fuck me.

 I was too nervous, my hands were jiggly, I felt a knot in my stomach, my mouth dry and I even felt a little queasy. I saw blood coming out of somewhere and thought the worst, but then I felt pain in my arm and I figured he ripped off my crust accidentally. He blushed and said he was really sorry, with blood all over his arms. My bed sheets started to soak on my blood, arm blood. We decided to stop a little and we smoked. I asked him if he had another condom and he said no. I must admit I got a little upset, but then he looked at me with his big shiny eyes and said, “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere”. I panicked, I just wanted him to leave, I don’t want him there at all, not with me, or anywhere near me. He spooned me and I wanted him to leave, I didn’t want any type of affection. He ran his fingers through my body, caressing every inch of me, he was getting excited but I felt like wherever he touched would light up in fire. He was burning me, I felt like I was going to die, I was feeling too anxious. I turned around and wanted to sit on him, but he kissed me; the worst thing he could’ve done. I didn’t want any kisses, or hugs, spooning, caressing, I just wanted him to fuck me, and nothing attached to it. Or maybe we were too drunk. 
 He came in my mouth, we came at the same time and I felt something warm inside me. Now I had a sappy bastard saying he’s sorry with his cum inside me. He threw his long arms around me and repeated a thousand times that he was sorry. I was catatonic; I couldn’t believe my luck, my fucking luck. He hugged me all night and started talking about him, I was bored, bored as fuck. He then decided to light up another joint and get baked as fuck talking about his ex girlfriends and boyfriends; I was disgusted by the cynicism of this guy, he was mushy, emotional, a pot head, and a cynic. I just wanted him to leave so I could curl up in my bed and think about how stupid that was. But instead, we fell asleep and when I woke up he brought me starbucks coffee and an emergency pill for the next day. I can’t believe this asshole; he paid attention to type of coffee I like, he even brought breakfast to bed! I wanted to hurl, too much sweetness, this is fake, this is all fake. After an hour of small talk I told him that he should leave, he asked my phone number. He was sweet, tall and gorgeous, but I wouldn’t be able to hold on to someone so reasonable.